Category: Musings

  • Must Write

    I need to do it and I canI have to write it all down Right?Until there is nothing left to spill outFall haphazardly onto the floorMy secrets scurry away and hide in the rafters amongst the rats My hopes and dreams drift away with the breezes I need to write moreMore words, more ideas, more…

  • Naked

    Cool and damp earth presses against my skin, moisture seeps through my cotton shirt, an ant is crawling across my bare shin. I can hear the rain dropping rhythmically on the tin roof and sliding down the wall of glass. I can’t see the outside world and no one can see me here on this…

  • Octopus Advice

    I’ve meditated every morning for the past 209 days. By the time you’re reading this, it’ll be longer than that. I can genuinely say it has helped. But I still cry in the car and escape to the bathroom when I feel the first chest crushing blows of a panic attack. I don’t have the…

  • Another Friday

    My brain is meltingIt’s everywhere and nowhere.It doesn’t belong.Where is it? And it can’t be where it belongs.I don’t want to understand why someone would taste cold hard metal.I don’t want to feel a kinship for walking away.But I do.I feel it all. The hope and despair.Wanting to know, wanting to forget It’s everywhere and…

  • Grasping

    My hands are covered in dirtI’ve been grasping Pebbles are embedded in my palms Flowers bloom from my fingertips I keep tryingSinking my hands into the moist warm earth I’m searching For deep roots or a boulderI want to hold onI need something to hold onto I’m watching my own frantic effort to remain clinging…

  • An Actual Poem

    Your presence ignited a wildfire. And for that, there are fines owed. In lieu of US currency, I’ll accept the feeling of freedom that only comes with road trips,  and the calm joy of waking up to the clanging of pots and pans on a holiday morning. I don’t blame you for the words flowing…

  • Anywhere

    I’m not sure how to tell my story, I don’t know where to begin. And I sure, as hell don’t know where this ends. It’s just festering inside of me. It’s been festering inside of me like a disgusting abscess that someone mistakes for a pregnancy. I don’t know how else to put it. It’s…

  • Early November

    I feel settled, in myself, pleasant gray, Seagull cries, feral cats, walks on the beach, memories of novels set in seaside Britain. Sink full of dishes, seafood chowder, a clean fridge, hot coffee, black and white cookies, bowls of pasta and vodka sauce, grocery stores of memories. A down comforter, wood burning fires, the voice…

  • Alone

    Longing feels different here. In this moment.In this place. I want someone to read this. I want someone to hear this. I want other people to carry this burden with and for me. I know that’s unfair to ask.But I don’t care. I hate that. I lack. I lack the capacity to feign interest Or…

  • Updates of No Particular Importance

    Im sitting in the car waiting for school to get out. The rain is pounding down on the windshield and the colorful leaves look like an oil painting against an unfinished canvas. The sky a terrifying white of potential, and yet all I can think about is I miss this place or rather, that place.…